Personal Fun with Professor Torts

This is a little old, but I felt that sharing is important to the understanding of the life of a law student and the various ways in which one can avoid the Socratic Method.

Here at WM, the professors are super easy when it comes to calling on students. Generally, at least for my classes, there has been minimum cold calling. In Civ, he puts a letter on the board. If your last name falls under the letter, then you know to prepare yourself to be called on. In Crim, she started off being fairly random, but relied on volunteers. Now, Professor Crim prefers to call on students alphabetically. Cool beans.

…Professor Torts. He’d go down the rows one by one addressing each student individually. That was cool. You knew that being in the front of the class, if he passed you that you wouldn’t have to go again for a LONG time! That was awesome. You could focus your reading on other classes and then catch up on the weekends if necessary. Until recently, he decided that he was going to take volunteers. I skipped the class (GASP!) in which he informed everyone of the change because I was sick. I also didn’t read because I couldn’t focus with all of the snottiness and throaty pain going on either.

Okay… so, there I am. In class. Professor Tort’s teaching style is WAY off, so no one really pays attention. I’m doing the reading for that day while he lectures and all of a sudden I hear him say, “I’m tired of volunteers, I’m just going to do lightening strikes!” WTF?! ARE YOU KIDDING?! He decides to pick a random name….”ESQ!”

What am I supposed to do at this point? I am not up to where he is in his lecture and I have no clue what this case is even about. I think back to my dear college roommate, Meg, who’s motto for life is “If you don’t know what to do, do nothing.” And that’s exactly what I did. I did not look up from my screen, I did not look around, I just sat there tap, tap, tapping away on my laptop. Meanwhile, my roommate and everyone else was anxiously waiting for me to respond. “ESQ? There’s no ESQ’s in this class, that’s weird. Okay so how about Laura?”

Not only did I dodge the bullet of being embarassed in class, but my classmates were quite impressed by my wherewithal to get out of answering. I feel truly accomplished. Since that day almost two weeks ago, a couple of others have used my technique or at least a version of it. Apparently, I’m not the only one that doesn’t get Professor Tort’s teaching style. Hell most of the time, I’m not even sure of what he’s saying. lol.

On the Subject of Pineapple Cups

I know I know, we’ve killed this topic over and over again with regard to appropriate drinks that men can order. The anniversary of the Pineapple Cup just passed with another year of our dear BK’s life. We were first introduced to the Pineapple Cup during her birthday dinner and I snapped that photo under the guise of finding Chriscus’s tempura to be too pretty to not take a picture of. Hot damn!

Poca’s response to my comment made me ponder the question, “What would you do if a guy ordered a Pineapple Cup on a date?”

After much consideration, I concluded that while my first instinct would be to pack my food up and leave, I would probably wind up laughing, pointing, and commenting on how fruity he looks with the fruity drink until he finally packs up his food and leaves me there… alone, but humored at the table. lol.

Another year gone, but the memories linger on. I love you, Pineapple Cup!

Legal Skills

Today, I’m sitting in the quietest part of the library in an effort to get a memo done for my least favorite class, Legal Skills. Those of you who are not subjected to Legal Skills are lucky. I assume you have something like Legal Research and Writing where youlearn how to do all of the things are truly important to 1Ls. On the contrary, at my school, we are set up into fake firms and are forced to do things like interview “clients,” write them letters, and essentially pretend over and over again that we are attys.

At first this sounded okay to some. I could see how it could be fun right? WRONG! Not only do they do things like drop new assignments on us before we can even get started on the current one, but they make us turn in outlines! WTF?! Outlines?! Outlines are for losers! …okay maybe not, but they are for personal use. Why do I need to make my thoughts coherent enough for someone else to understand when the whole purpose of the outline is to help ME! UGH. But whatevs, I do the outline. I get it all pretty and cleaned up…essentially I could write the dern paper if I took out the roman numerals and what not. I turn it in and anxiously await the feedback. This was two weeks ago.

Last Tuesday’s Legal Skills class, no outlines. New assignment to do some “fake negotiations” for another project, but no outline. I’m starting to see a pattern here…inundate them with enough crap and maybe they’ll forget that they turned in something. We were told that we should have the outlines by “tomorrow,” which I assumed meant erm Wednesday?! Nope! No outline in my hangfile on Wednesday.

Friday, I was deathly sick (okay so it’s a cold, but it’s the second one since September!), but still went on campus to do some ADR thing for Civ Pro. My partner, Killian’s as I affectionately call her, informed me that I have yet another amazing surprise in my hang file. TA DA!!! ANNNNOOOOOTTTTTHHHHHHEEEERRRRR Legal Skills assignment. WTF ALREADY! Apparently, we have to do another letter and yet another mediation. GREAT! Gag me all the way in the back of my throat with a fork already! Still, however, no outline.

Today, I get a little pissy in the pants and decide to email my Sr. and Jr. partners (the two folks that “moderate” my section). It read:

I’m writing because I’m a bit confused about the outline turn around. I recall Ms. Sr. Partner saying that we would receive our memos back on the day after our last Legal Skills meeting. It is my understanding that the purpose of doing the outline assignment was to get feedback about the way that we set up our memos. However, I’m lost on the good that feedback can do four days before the memo assignment is due as it is now Monday and I still have not received my outline back.
Is there anyway that I can get my outline today?

I personally feel as though that was quite tame for how I was really feeling. Two minutes later….

Esq, Have you checked your hanging file? Your outline with feedback should be there.

…….Annoyed? Very. Extremely! I’m just over Legal Skills at this point. Curses!

I love fall…

Sitting here doing my torts outline, I realized just how pleasantly cool it is outside. There are kids in hoodies and jeans and I’m all snuggled warm in my PJs. (Yes it’s 5:30 in the afternoon, but so what!)

I logged on to my comp and pulled up the net to this beautiful picture: I was immediately in awe! I LOVEEEE the fall. Everything about it makes me happy!

Also, I get a text from BK today who is in TX with her friend from her military hey days. The friend’s daughter is going to be a Viking and picked it because the hat was “awesome!” LOVEEEEE IT! She apparently also adores the furry boots that accompany the outfit. Something about seeing a sweet girl in something as aggressive looking as a Viking outfit sets my mind aglow with thoughts about my daughter and her pseudo sisters. Ahhhhh fall! I love it!

LSATS, Law School, and other things to avoid Civ Pro

So again, I’m on this blog instead of doing tomorrow’s reading for Civ Pro. I’d like to convince myself that I have mad time, unfortunately I don’t. Only one more hour before a BLSA meeting and then I’m on the phones harassing alumni until 6 p.m. as volunteer work for the school. Good times!

So yea, I realized by the number of hits that I’m getting for LSATs and schools that it’s about that time again. The rush for October LSAT is on… (or did that pass this weekend?) I think I took it on the 5th last year. I digress, if you’ve taken it then this will be no help…though I doubt it would’ve been super helpful to begin with! …hmm, interesting. I was going to talk about pre-LSAT stuff, but maybe now…..

So you’ve taken the LSAT? What now?! …better.

If you’re anything like me, I checked my Blackberry (poor sucker’s lost, but that’s another subject) like 8,000 times an hour waiting for the LSAC.org email with my score lodged somewhere in all that font. For many of you, there’s a pleasant surprise. For others, well you may feel like slamming your head into a wall and laying on the floor wallowing in what smells like urine, but is actually just plain despair. There are options, however, if you end up in the latter category after finding out your score.

Obviously, you can take the LSAT again in December….. Sure you may not get as much in scholly money as the person who already had their docs submitted by Nov 1, but with that measley 148 would you have gotten the scholly money anyway?! My point! SO, while it sucks, seriously consider taking it again (especially if you fall in line with the less than 3 times rule).

For those who are pleasantly surprised at their scores, there’s no greater time than the present to sign up OFFICALLY for LSAC.org. Sure you have the free account, but paying for membership places a wealth of awesome law school application tools in your hand. I loved it particularly because it saved me from having to print out a million copies of my application and also because it fills out most forms for you. Be sure to proof read even if it does fill out sections according to the template you create. I noticed that sometimes there was information on the wrong lines because the actual applications for schools was a little different than the others before it. You’ll see what I mean. Then again, you really shouldn’t be going to law school if you’re not anal about such things.

This is also a good time to pick out your top five schools. You know, those places where if you don’t get in you’d absolutely die! Make sure that there are about two reach schools and three target (though good) schools. I’m more cautious than the average person, so I certainly thought about target and below target schools because I wanted to make sure that I could AFFORD law school. There’s nothing better than schollys, but that’s another blog post. Once you have those five awesome schools draw them out on a huge sheet of paper and put them on your wall. Look at them everyday…. I’m not joking! I’m serious. Once you’ve scoured their websites, you should make phone calls to the schools’ admissions offices and sign up for tours. There’s no way that you should be putting a lot of thought and effort into a school that you don’t know anything about. I learned the hard way that you don’t want to decide that you absolutely would never go to a school after you’ve spent $12 on LSAC.org fees applying to them (that’s if you get the app for free).

Oh that brings me to another point, Google search your schools to see if they give out free application waivers if you go on their tours or sign up for the mailing list. A lot of the times schools that you wouldn’t mind paying the $60 app fee for are free…. like coughcoughURcoughcough. lol. Check out law school websites for all of that information.

My final piece of “What to do after the LSAT” is to breathe! You’ve spent booku hours dealing with games and reading passages, it’s time for you to enjoy life a little. Take a staycation or go up to the mall without feeling like there’s something else you need to be doing. This is the easiest part of the whole process, that period of nothingness! Once you get your scores, it’s all down hill… applications, the waiting game, choosing a school, admitted students day, etc. Relax for now and enjoy!

More to come later, for now CIV PRO!

More Fun with Professor Torts!

Just when you thought this was bad enough…..

Today in Torts, the same kid enters a discussion about lawyers and their clients. Professor Torts offers a hypo about pro bono work and what standard of care an atty should be held to when they take on clients for free. (Paraphrased)

Victim: Pro Bono shouldn’t be all free, I mean can’t attorneys get a tax write off for charity work?

Professor Torts (who is the self professed master of all laws beginning with “T” including TAX LAW): …..wait I don’t understand what you’re saying?

Victim: You know how like you can write off charitable donations, pro bono’s the same thing. Tax write off.

Professor Torts: HELLLLLL NO!!!!!!!!! (….think almost two shades lighter than Mya Wilkes’s “OH HELL NAW!” from Girlfriends)

The entire class erupts into laughter. I walk out of class and get stopped by two seperate individuals who wanted to discuss how funny that interchange was….lol. It happens, but wow twice?! LOL! *dead*

An Afternoon with Former SCOTUS Justice Sandra Day O’Connor

Justice O’Connor is one feisty lady. I had a lot of fun listening to her talk to a couple of news media-ticions, a VA Assistant Atty General, and Dean Douglas on Saturday afternoon. It was worth it being inside on a beautiful sunny day for this once in a lifetime candid discussion about her thoughts on the court, life, and the like.

On being Chancellor of the Law School:
Dean Douglas introduced Justice O’Connor by listing her successors of her position. When he mentioned George Washington, she interrupted by telling everyone that he wrote a letter accepting the position, but “He’d do it so long as he didn’t have to go to Williamsburg.” LOL! Even our first president was anti-Burg, we have so much in common!

On Our Nation’s Ignorance:
“A mere 20% of the population can name the justices on the Supreme Court, and I’d venture to say that they could only name 1 or 2. Compare that to 90% of them who can name the judges on American Idol.” The old guy sitting in front of me: Damn Paula!

She asked us to encourage everyone to check out the new educational website: Ourcourts.org

John Stewart Interview:
Justice O’Connor went on the Daily Show…many funny comments came from this, but I love that she said “I only went on because he graduated from W&M, so obviously he’s smart.”

On her personal papers in The Congressional Library:
Columnist: So when are you going to allow them to release the documents?
Justice O’Connor: It’ll be a long time. Don’t wait, live your life.
(LOL I thought for sure she was going to quip, “Don’t hold your breath!”)

On being forced to sit on the lower court after retirement from SCOTUS:
Justice O’Connor: Who knew that it was mandatory that I’d have to sit on the federal court? If I would’ve known that I wouldn’t have retired. Who would?!
Columnist: That’s only if you don’t want to lose your pension right?
Other reporter guy: I mean what if you don’t?
Justice O’Connor: I just know it’s required. I’m not going to test Congress!

On the late Chief Justice Rehnquist:
Justice O’Connor: When the red light came on, he was so quick with cutting people off I’d swear the trap door in the floor would open and counsel would fly down!

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Memoirs of an Imperfect Angel Review

Okay so a law student shouldn’t have this much time, but in an effort to avoid doing Civ Pro at this very second, I’m going for it. I downloaded the CD yesterday off of Amazon.com (BOO @ all the bootleggers it was only $6, you know who you are lol lol lol!) The only problem with that is that I typically like to put the CD and bang it out the first time in my car on a beautiful day, but I just couldn’t help myself. I’m like a little kid with a quarter at the store. It just has to be spent…. feel me?!
On that note, here we go:
1. Betcha Gon’ Know
STRAIGHT Banger! The beat and her voice vibrate through the beginning of the song and she delivers each word perfectly (“Welcome to a day of my life, Memoirs of an Imperfect Angel. Welcome, welcome welcome”). The song is a story about her finding her man in her own bedroom having sex with another girl. The best part is the delivery of her emotions as she leaves without saying a word and drives herself away because “It’s too dangerous to be, In the vicinity of where you are.” Twinged with the Dream and Tricky Stewart’s production and the background vocals. This is a song that even dudes could probably feel (and I’m not necessarily talking just the typical MC fan). Think R.Kelly’s Mr. Big days, this is so “secret lover undercover” post “In the Closet.” The Dolby speakers on my laptop aren’t doing the beat justice on this one. Trust me when I say, bang this on with the windows down loud and from the onset your lust for a good “f’him” song is complete. She ends with “to be continued…”
2. Obsessed…. see the previous review HERE!
3. H.A.T.E. U. (Having A Typical Emotional Upset
Think the 2009 version of 1997’s Breakdown complete with the snare drum in the background. Add to that though, the intermittent trademark Mariah high notes and it’s an awesomely fantastic breakup song that could get anyone over a crappy ex. I surely could’ve used this years ago, but for now I’ll just suggest it for any of you going through that mess. This chick’s happy
4. Candy Bling
Snapping along to this midtempo, I swoon to the thoughts of first loves and the adorable cuteness of new love. The lyrics, while juvenile at times, fit in an odd way given the theme of the song. And hey, Mariah is eternally 12 right? “Back in the day we were in love, we’re not in love anymore but some days I sit and wish we was in love again” and “I would take this love throwback from the top. Go DJ play my song and imma think about you all night long” take me to a different time. You really have to immerse yourself in the sentiment of the song to truly get it. A casual listener could probably dismiss it as a good arrangement with superfluous lyrics, but true fans could probably take it back to her “The Roof” and “Fourth of July” reminiscent love songs.
5. Ribbon
How can one song be so HOOD and SEDUCTIVE at the same time. I definitely imagine a girl that doesn’t know how to quite articulate how she feels about a guy so she just breaks it down as “You got me wrapped up, wrapped up ribbon with a bow on it.” Just like Damn boy, you got me there! Just where you want me and I don’t even know how else to express it. “Wish i had twenty million hours, to caress you, and undress you. To be continued….” This song continues in the Betcha Gon Know fashion of rap beat with Mariah’s voice riding it in such a feminine way contrasting the hard with the soft. Super catchy and another one to bang loud with the windows down.
6. Inseparable
Per. Fek. Shun. That same infectiousness that was “We Belong Together” and “Don’t Forget About Us.” Easily my favorite song on the album and I can definitely see me and my girls belting this nonstop to the bar. She even samples Cyndi Lauper when she sings, “Time after time, Boy I’m lost can’t you look won’t you please find me. I’m down to my last chance come rescue me.” And then, if that wasn’t awesome enough, she ends that verse with the most fantastic unexpected Minnie Ripperton rip out of NO WHERE! Per. Fek. Shun. I loooooove this song ya’ll!
7. Standing O
Take a blend of Beyonce’s “Irreplaceable” and Rihanna’s “Take a Bow” put them in a hotel room and let them make sweet love to each other and you have this women’s anthem love child. “Here’s your standing ovation. Doctor, I was too patient, even when you wasn’t enough I’m the one that taught you how to love” I’m sure that you know someone you could scream the words to this song to. We all do right?
8. It’s a Wrap
Part 1 out of 2 of the most hilarious “f’him” songs. “Yet another early morning. And you walked in like its nothing. Hold up, hold up, hold up. Ain’t no donuts ain’t no coffee. See i know you seen me callin and callin. I should crack you right in your forehead” That says it all. Now, you could read that one of two ways, but until you hear it in the context of the rhythm and her voice, you’re probably reading it wrong. It’s hilarious, but catchy as all get out too. Blame that on The Dream.
9. Up Out My Face
Part 2 out of 2 of the most hilarious “f’him” songs. Think “Shake It Off,” but with lyrics like “Not even a welder and a builder can rebuild this shit (I break); Not even a nail technician with a whole of gel and acrylic can fix this (I break); If we were two Lego blocks even the Harvard University Graduating Class of 2010 couldn’t put us back together again.” NUFF SAID! LMFAOOOOOOO!
*Oh and…this song kinda has an R.Kelly feel to it. You know that whole ridiculous but you sing it anyway feel. Yep, listen to it and think about R.Kelly before he was a perv. (BEFORE he was a perv!)
10. Up Out My Face (reprise)
Marching band awesomeness. Random! But all of this hilarity isn’t new to MC fans. We’ve heard the extra songs that she’s thrown here and there with the funniest lyrics and concepts ever. This just adds to that sense of humor that her fans have come to love that others only see in the Brett Ratner films. LOVE IT! And it THUMPS!
11. More than Just Friends
More hilarity, but toned down a bit. Shout outs to McDonalds and “all over your lips like gelato” add to the fun of the song, but it reminds me of mid 90’s commercial songs hit that tone of just perfect swaying music. Think Total, Gina Thompson, Aaliyah. This song reminds me of singing all those jams in the car with my girls while my mom drove us to the mall. On the bridge, Mariah’s voice hits a perfect sweet tone that takes me even as far back as Tiffany songs. Innocent and fun, flirty and energetic. Okay maybe not all the way back to mall rats, but definitely mid 1990s with a twinge of today. Love it!
12. The Impossible
Per. Fek. Shun. PART II! Staying with the 90’s theme, Mariah slows it down with a Jodeci autotune (old school style, not TPain – Autotune is dead b/s). I’m talking that Forever My Lady autotune to the beat that drives me craaaaazy when I hear it on the radio on a long trip. Who’s thinking about Jodeci these days? Mariah Carey. Girl brought it back… “Layin in the bed bumpin’ Jodeci. Forever your lay-day!” OMG! Yes! K-Ci, JoJo, Devante Swing, and whoever that last dude was lol. I keed, but yea yo, awesomeness. It’s so throwback… Throwback , Go DJ. Word.
13. The Impossible (The Reprise)
More of that Jodeci yummy deliciousness.
14. Angel (The Prelude)
Think “Bliss” off of the Rainbow album. Lots of flowy upper register notes flittering around your speakers like butterflies. Every time she does a song like this, I imagine the way I felt when the Dream Love video hit MTV. Just fields of beautiful serenity. Awesomeness.
15. Angels Cry
You wanted to hear old Mariah? Here you go. Wrapped up Wrapped up Ribbon with a Bow on it! The lyrics are emotional and sensitive. Imagine the “Butterfly” video when she’s on the horse fighting back tears and then we see her with mascara streaming down her face. I totally believed the emotion then and I do again now. The song is about lost love and fighting for it. It has all the sentiment of “Butterfly” and if you know me you know that’s my favorite Mariah song ever! “Cause lightning don’t strike
The same place twice. When you and I Said goodbye, I felt the angels cry. True love’s a gift, we let it drift in a storm every night I feel the angels cry.” Beautiful. (I actually just played this twice and sat and listened for a while before moving on to the next song). Crazy beautiful.
16. Languishing (The Interlude)
Another classic Mariah-feel song. Think “Close my Eyes,” “Reflections,” “Petals” and “Outside.” Yep that very same desire to have someone know exactly who she is. “Those ageless buried recollections, we transform them and select them. You have yours, I have mine that’s fine.” There’s meaning to her madness. It’s a message that she tends to tie into all of her albums. Most recently? Think “I Wish You Well.” And then it segues smoothly into….
17. I Want to Know What Love Is
Yes, the Foreigner remake that I had up not too long ago before it was taken off of YouTube. It’s a beautiful ending to the album and slightly more upbeat than the endings of the last few. It’s a positive note directed at her beautiful husband. Sure, she added a choir for effect, but this is a memoir remember? It ends with our heroine finding love for once and for all. “I wanna know what love is, I know you can show me….let’s talk about love”

So that’s it. Overall as a work, I think it succeeds in delivering everything for everyone. As a fan, I hate that she does that, but I understand that part of her being Mariah is being sensitive to the way she’s perceived. I love when she sings slow songs and you can feel a bit of that “old Mariah” but I guess I’ve been down since she left Sony and I don’t need old Mariah to be happy anymore. The truth of it is that since Butterfly, Mariah just hasn’t and won’t be the same. She’s a different artist with a voice that demands to be heard whether she’s joking about Harvard Graduates or singing about endless love. You can’t deny her talent and her ability to weave herself into what people want.
Oh and one last thing. Keep in mind that this is a totally different album. If we look at Emancipation of Mimi as the diva disc, E=MC2 as the fun and playful, and MOAIA is completely different than them both. There’s no overlap on these. It’s throwback, it’s new and innovative, it’s 2009 Mariah.
Now I’m off to bump “Inseparable” and “Impossible” til it drives my roommates crazy! Laters!

Story of the Month

And it ends with…. He peed in her panties! Hilarious!
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I know this took me a while to get around to, but it was worth the wait. So the other night, I was in the presence of a new set of girls and heard the funniest story. I won’t get into too many details and I doubt anyone that knows her doesn’t know the story so it’s all good. If not, hit me up at mlb1216@gmail.com and I’ll delete or make private.

So picture it, we walk into a bar and she’s talking to a guy that sees us and immediately dips out the door. Mkaaaay, so what’s up with that?

Apparently, the guy and her were hooking up and she wanted more, he didn’t. So they go out one night get wasted with her roommate and when they all get back to the apt, he proceeds to get in her roommate’s bed. Being an awesome friend, she jumps up and runs into her friend’s room to let her know that her “man” is being a perv. They have an awesome girl power moment and scream and yell until he finally takes the hint and leave.

Okay so fast foward to the next day and the roommate is taking a shower. She gets out of the shower and goes to grab a pair of underwear. Damp. Mkkkkaaay. Weird. She grabs another and realizes that all of her panties and bras are soaked in PEE! How gross is that?!

Meanwhile, as we’re sitting at the bar, the girl was really worried about how their mutual friends would see her after the “breakup” to which my friend replies…. “WHO CARES! HE PISSED IN HER PANTIES!”

HILARIOUS!

I must really be PMS’in…

Because this commercial almost made me cry! I know I’ve been posting a lot of YouTube crap and not very much of my own stuff, but I had to share.

Something about the way Psycho T pumps his fist when he finds out that the dog has been located just choked me up. *dreamy sigh*